Posted on December 10th, 2009
As parents we tell tall tales - frequently. This time of year we tell the tallest one of all. So, do we perpetuate the Santa thing, or succumb to that nagging feeling to tell the truth? (Damn, this parenting thing is hard!) Here are two opposing viewpoints from local life coaches on our choices and their effects. You decide.
Mary Tomlinson says, “Create wonder.”
As my children were growing up, we continued the Santa tradition. My “babies,” David and Sarah, are now 22 and 24. Curious how they saw the Santa situation, I asked them how they felt when they discovered he wasn’t real. I also wanted to know, “Did they feel betrayed by me and their dad?” Not only did they enlighten me with their insight; they tickled my heart with their perspective.
Lorena Jefferson says, “Build character.”
Ask yourself, “What am I teaching my child?” What are the consequences of choosing to lie to my child? Yes, I said it; Santa is a lie. You can hate me now, or you can choose to hear me out. If you lie (yep, said it again) to your child throughout the year, can you really expect her to be an honest person? Clearly, we are not choosing to be honest when we tell tales of Santa Claus.
Read the full article about Pinocchio Parenting in PLAYGOUND online or pick up a hard copy at one of our distribution locations.
We’d love to hear what the parents of Central Florida think. Tell us your thoughts on Santa this season. Is he a welcomed visitor or has he been “outted” in your home? How exactly do you handle the Santa situation in your family?
December 10th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
I try to focus on gift giving more than we focus on gift receiving. Santa is a definite part of my household but I try to avoid the blatant lies. I heard from my friend to only have Santa bring one big gift each year, instead of a laundry list as once they get a little older the list can add up to some major $$$. It’s worked out great for us so far.
December 10th, 2009 at 11:01 pm
My parents felt like the latter, and I grew up never getting to believe in Santa. I was also the one kid running around telling all of the other kids he wasn’t real. (I know - such a jerk!) In truth, I was so jealous that they got to have that experience, and I couldn’t. To this day I still wonder what that magic must have felt like. My daughter turned 10 this year and now knows he isn’t real. She has no anger or remorse or mistrust about it. We have actually had so much fun re-counting all of the years of “Santa’s” gifts, and half-eaten cookies, and hoof prints, and stocking stuffers…it’s like unraveling the back workings of an elaborate surprise party. It’s all done in love and fun! I say let Santa live!
December 17th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
I find it amazing that you both come from a different upbringing but your comments are not surprising. Truth is a rare thing in society and it is an extremely rare in individuals. Truth is defined as conformity with fact or reality;the state or character of being true. So, you see it is still a choice. The difference between a lie and truth is very clear when we choose to stand firm on it. Trying to to avoid the blatant lies will never be reality, choose to tell the truth and it is done. It is like saying Im not a thief because I only take small things, not big things. If you really believed it was ok, you would not wait to steal and hide it; you would pick it up,tell the store and walk out! So, no matter the excuse used, people choose to be honest or not…It is your choice but there will be consequences. Children are not going to be honest with you about the situation. As, an adult you are responsible for teaching your children and you will teach them whatever you model, not what you say. “A fruit tree can only produce it’s kind of fruit”, Remember your children are your fruit, so it is fantasy to believe you able to instill something into them the opposite of what is in you. “Because ,you say the sky is red, does not make it cease to be blue…Truth has never changed and it never will, whether you choose it or not….. But remember, there is no good or bad ; right or wrong just consequences for choices…..